31 Funny Christmas Jokes SMS Wishes Messages

A boy writes to Santa asking for a brother and receives a reply back from Santa: send me your mother!

A song told me to Deck the Halls…so I did. Mr.and Mrs. Hall are not very happy.

All I want for Christmas is youuuuuuuu……..to get hit by a reindeer

Christmas has been cancelled! Santa died laughing when I told him you’d been good this year! Funy Christmas Messages

Christmas light displays are the freestyle rap battles of the suburbs.

Dear Christmas Carolers, the only thing that can bring “Joy To The World” is a “Silent Night”.

Funny Christmas Jokes For Friends Family

Funny Christmas Jokes For Friends Family

Dear Santa, I can explain…..

For Christmas I want Santa’s list of naughty girls.

I got more hoes than Santa Claus.

Funny Christmas Jokes For Family

I had a dream about my kids finding their gifts early or as I like to call it “The Nightmare Before Christmas”. Christmas Jokes For Friends

I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

I thought I’d get in trouble for taking a baseball bat to my neighbors Christmas decorations, but now I’m gnome free.

I try to be unusually kind and compassionate to those around me during the Holidays, because I never know who will end up being my Secret Santa. Christmas 2017

Is anyone else waiting until December 22nd to Christmas shop? Just in case the Mayans were right?

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

Funny Christmas Messages For Friends

Last Christmas, I gave you my scarf but the very next day, you called it “dumb and gay”

May Christmas be about what’s in your Heart and not what’s in your pocket!

Funny Christmas Messages For Kids Children

Funny Christmas Messages For Kids Children

My boyfriend is just like Santa Claus. He gives me presents and is imaginary. Merry Christmas 2017

My neighbor put up his Christmas lights today. I bet he’s pissed that I beat him to it. I put mine up three years ago.

Remember, Christmas isn’t about how big the tree is, or what’s under it. It’s about who’s around it

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.

So when someone ask you ” Where is your Christmas Spirit?” is it so wrong to point out your liquor cabinet?

The awkward moment when Santa Claus has the same wrapping paper as your parents.

There is a special place in hell for people that play Christmas music before Thanksgiving. Christmas Jokes

This holiday season, in lieu of gifts, I’ve decided to give everyone my opinion.

Funny Christmas Jokes For Kids on Merry Christmas 2017

To all the people that piss me off, I hope you get Crocs for Christmas.

What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a new job the next day.

When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas!

Yo mama so fat when she triend to talk to Santa Clause, Santa Clause said “Why u doing the harlem shake?” Merry Christmas Wishes

your mum is so fat that I took a picture of her last christmas and its still printing!

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